I left Texas for Spain 10 years ago—7 things I don’t miss about the U.S.
Ten years ago, I boarded a one-way flight from Houston to Madrid with a suitcase and a rough plan to teach English for a year. I was 35 and knew I needed a change.
As the daughter of Colombian and Iranian immigrants growing up in Texas, I never felt like I belonged anywhere. This changed when I moved to Spain in 2015. Here I have built a life centered around community, freedom and balance.
Along the way, I figured out the logistics, visas, and mindset changes involved in starting abroad. Now through my platform Pressed the refresh buttonI help other women over 30 find their own moves.
I still visit the US frequently and there are so many things I love about being back; including my family, friends, and my annual TJ Maxx run. But after 10 years in Europe, there are many things that come to mind. don’t do that I miss life in America.
1. Only 10 days of PTO
When I was in the US, I would hoard my 10 precious PTO days like gold. Asking for time off felt like disappointing my co-workers. Sometimes during vacation I would leave days unused or check my emails.
The lack of freedom wore me out. I became a chronic work lover in my 20s, leaving a job about every nine months just to travel for the summer. It wasn’t sustainable, but it was the only way I could see the world.
2. Car addiction
When I lived in Texas, I couldn’t survive without a car. Grocery store? To spread. Gym? To spread. Life revolved around traffic, parking and gas prices. I didn’t realize how exhausting everything was until we left.
Madrid, where I first lived, and Malaga, where I am currently incredibly walkable. Most of what I need is within a 20-minute walk, including grocery stores, cafes, and my co-working space.
When I can’t walk, I use the bus or metro, which are clean, reliable and cheap. For longer journeys, high-speed trains make it much easier to explore the rest of the country, even if you’re on a budget.
Cepee Tabibian is in Budapest.
Courtesy of Cepee Tabibian
Walking everywhere has done wonders for my stress levels. Instead of sitting in traffic, I start and end the day with fresh air and sunshine. I feel more connected to my neighborhood; I know the baker, the grocer and even the stray cats. Moreover, I reached my step count without even trying.
3. GoFundMe style healthcare
The US healthcare system used to be one of my biggest sources of stress. Every doctor visit was like spinning the roulette wheel; You never knew what surprise bill you would get. Finding a primary care doctor meant endless searches, and I was constantly worrying about what would and wouldn’t be covered.
in spain, it’s the opposite. Healthcare is affordable, accessible and simple. I make appointments through an app, wait times are short, and as a healthy 45-year-old, I pay about $76 a month for private insurance.
4. Sense of danger in public places
In the USA I was always on guard. Whether it was walking through a parking lot after dark or attending a crowded event, there was a persistent, low level of concern about harassment and gun violence.
of spain strict gun laws help. Automatic weapons are prohibited and firearm ownership is strictly controlled. Global Peace Index While Spain is among the 25 most peaceful countries in the world, the USA does not even make it into the top 100.
5. Eliminate the feeling of guilt
Every time I visit the US, I’m shocked at how out of control tipping has gotten. Even if you’re picking up cookies from a bakery or using the self-checkout feature, the screen sometimes changes with the options beginning At 20%!
Cepee Tabibian is in Cádiz, Spain.
Courtesy of Cepee Tabibian
In Spain, where service staff are paid more fairly, saving or leaving a few coins in restaurants is a small sign of appreciation. not an expectation. And you’ll never be asked for a tip for your morning pastries.
6. Extreme patriotism and polarization
What I have seen more clearly since leaving the United States is how Americans are beset by intense political division. Don’t get me wrong, Spain has its complexities – different regions with their own identities, languages and politics – but the overall energy feels less combative.
There is less of a “best country in the world” mentality, which usually comes from people who have never seen the world. The United States does many things well, but so do many other countries, including Spain.
7. Pressure to follow a traditional timeline
As a woman in the United States, I felt the social expectation that by the time I was 35, I should be married with children. It wasn’t me and it made me feel like I was left behind.
in spain, where Average age at marriage is 38.8 It’s completely normal to be single and childless in your 30s and 40s (compared to 30.8 in the US). It’s great to go out and see lots of people your age and older at social events, bars and more. When I moved here in my mid-30s, I felt much less judgment for being independent and not having children.
Of all the things I didn’t miss, this might be the most effective. Releasing the pressure of following a traditional timeline has given me the freedom to build a life I love.
Cepee Tabibian is the founder Pressed refreshA community and resource platform that helps women over 30 move abroad. HE, “I’m Out of Here! An American’s Essential Visa Guide to Living in Europe″ and the host He hit the renewal podcast. The daughter of Colombian and Iranian immigrants, Cepee grew up in Houston, Texas, before immigrating to Spain. Follow him for tips and real talk on how to move abroad @shehitrefresh
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