England’s Bazball capitulation and tactical unravelling under Brendon McCullum and Ben Stokes

Duckett, who won matches on his day, fell victim to several five-star deliveries in the first three Tests. But his needless escape to Adelaide’s Pat Cummins, who had just 10 minutes to survive until lunch on the fourth day, was frustrating. Especially when he was walking towards the mansion, he was practicing his leave.

Harry Brook and Ollie Pope have become the poster boys for quick shots and bloodshed.

Brook said ahead of the Adelaide Test that he would toughen up his batting after being dismissed for a pair of “shocking shots”. His ramp attempt in the second innings, and his eventual termination to the ill-advised reverse sweep, caused Ricky Ponting to rage, calling it “the worst innings I’ve ever seen”.

The 11 days Australia needed to reel off the Ashes was the second least amount of time needed behind the 1921 series, which was completed in just eight days.

But in terms of batting endurance, over a century ago the post-war English faced 3413 men who lost their first three Tests (think extreme odds!).

With his determination to push the boundaries – apart from a couple of Ben Stokes wickets, Joe Root’s century and a recalibration in Adelaide – England managed to face just 2462 balls before ending the series.

And even while batting with more composure in the third Test, wicketkeeper Jamie Smith could not hold his own when he finally found his form and hit a fluent knock of 60 on day five.

Four Smith boundaries in as many overs against the new ball brought England to within 149 runs of a world-record run chase to keep the series alive. They also got Smith back as he backed himself up to take another swing at Mitchell Starc, only to throw his wicket to Pat Cummins at mid-on.

England has fallen into its own pit time and time again.

Wrong horses for wrong courses

First of all, England’s reckless and wasteful batting is why things went south so dramatically and quickly, with the flow increasing the tourists’ drift.

Will Jacks, a serious part-time batting all-rounder, performed admirably at the willow – which is why he was called up to Brisbane to shore up the senior side’s underachievement.

But Stokes, operating as England’s front-line player in a recalibrated attack, used the Jacks sparingly – in just 11 of the 117 overs scored by England in Brisbane.

Jacks’ penalty in Adelaide was a plausible explanation as Australia held him to more than 100 runs in every innings. But what more can one expect from a spinner whose first-class average was 43, who took just five wickets last season?

No. 1 spinner Shoaib Bashir was on the bench for the England team throughout this period. Bashir has been improving for two years as England’s leading Ashes setter has yet to win him a game.

Elsewhere, Mark Wood’s withdrawal from the series with a knee injury and Gus Atkinson’s departure from Brisbane has led to Brydon Carse opening the bowling in Adelaide.

But again, Carse managed this only 20 times with the new ball in domestic cricket and repeatedly bowled too short. That could have been a hangover, despite the short-ball barrage he was tasked with delivering in Brisbane before a marked change.

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Either way, in hindsight, Josh Tongue’s much flatter offerings from the rest of England’s attack should have seen him selected earlier in the series.

While Australia’s controversial moves (dropping Nathan Lyon for Michael Neser, opening with Travis Head) paid off, England only added to their troubles.

Timid tactics: Anti-baseball

Stokes’ field placements were baffled at times after Perth’s first-innings attack was turned against the visitors by Travis Head, bestowing a scenario that any captain would struggle to contain.

Especially the Australian queue in Brisbane. And again with the series in Adelaide. For all Bazball’s aggression and positivity, England appear to have backed away from him when it was most convenient.

Day three offered the chance to get back into another contest after England’s intermediate breakthroughs under the lights at the Gabba. Instead, with Australia’s tail facing the new pink ball, Mitchell Starc found an on-off spread and happily led the innings of a 75-run, ninth-wicket partnership.

Boland, a true Test tailor, batted 16 overs before lunch on the third day. However, Boland faced more than two balls and only three more times as Starc was able to manage the duo’s strike distribution with relative ease.

In all, 182 runs from Australia’s tail end took the Test away from England despite little being done to stop them.

Similarly, on day three in Adelaide the tourists returned to the middle after lunch with an 85-point lead at 1-17. If you’re attacking with the ball and the field, it’s definitely time to get the run on the line.

Marnus Labuschagne started the session at the crease, but there was only one catcher fielder behind the wicket. Jofra Archer rushed Labuschagne and Travis Head without a hole and effectively with more than 50 ring space, seemingly prioritizing containment.

The latter happily built the foundation of his 170 with more runs scored (39) than anywhere else – the majority of those simple singles when England needed to be all out. And of course, when England’s tactics brought chances, there was no confidence their fielders would hold on to them.

Five catches took place in one day in Brisbane, adding an extra 145 runs to Australia’s first innings. Two dropped efforts from Adelaide’s Harry Brook allowed Usman Khawaja and Head to post another 148 between them over two innings.

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In all, McCullum succinctly summed it up while standing on the boundary rope Sunday afternoon; Stokes echoed that sentiment in an 18-minute press conference shortly afterwards.

“They outplayed us with the bat, outplayed us with the ball, outplayed us in the field,” McCullum said.

And for all Bazball’s voice and fury, it makes no sense.