The ‘dreaded middle’ or a secret superpower? Why turning 40 in 2026 feels like a trap – and a triumph
This March, I’m turning 40 to celebrate another International Women’s Day. How do I feel about entering the “horrible middle” of society in a week when the focus is squarely on us? Questions arise: At what age do we reach the peak of happiness? How old is Jacinda Ardern? Why do my ears itch?
But perhaps we are looking at everything wrong; maybe 40 is the key to a secret, suspended area where the men stack all the kitchen cutlery in the office.
For as long as I can remember, I have seen my youth as a disadvantage. In my 20s, I reluctantly joined my girl group at our local R&B nightclub late on Friday nights, engaged in superficial conversations with guys, and endured casual ageism at work on Monday. In my 30s, as the head of a marketing agency, being perceived as young felt like a barrier because of what it meant for women in this country. The title “entrepreneur” inevitably has the word “young” in front of it. Microaggressions like “Mom and Dad must be proud,” as if I was given an achievement award at the meeting. “I don’t look that old,” it is said. People gossiping about my boss to me at networking events as boss.
While it’s hard to quantify – as with most unconscious bias stories – my hunch is that I missed opportunities because I was inexperienced or perceived to not have a considered perspective. After all, in marketing and life, perception and timing are everything.
However, as I approached 40, I felt this insecurity ease. My aching body eventually catches up to the person I always am inside, and the audience catches up too. I want what I want without much thought; As a former people pleaser, it’s something I would struggle with. I progressed from browsing for blue light blocking glasses at Bailey Nelson to getting a biannual prescription for my astigmatism at Specsavers. I order an oat milk latte that burns my tongue. I no longer recognize the artists on Triple J’s Hottest 100 list. Amyl and Recruiters?
Growing older in this decade has felt like a steady build-up of momentum, more mental instruments (and neck spasms) coming into play, and building towards a crescendo.
But now, on the eve of my 40s, as I looked in the mirror and peeled off the gray, a new fear emerged: What if what I’ve been unconsciously trading for all this time is my youth? What if this is what compels people to support my success, validates me as a digital expert, and differentiates me from my competitors?
My fear is not unfounded. An article published by iab australia reports that my industry is leaning heavily towards a younger demographic. Less than a fifth of Australia’s media industry is now aged 40 or over. And according to the latest census, the average media agency worker is 32 years old. Australian Media Federation.
A lot industry leaders seem to agree There’s an unspoken belief that people over 40 are less likely to be up to date on technology or attuned to popular culture and consumer trends. Growing old in an industry that celebrates youth and in a society that “destroys” aging women is truly alarming. Where once I stood out in my youth, for better or for worse, I now blend in with the crowd. I’ve never been willing to follow the rules, but here I am, going through airport security screening while men are distracted by shiny objects elsewhere.
This begs the question: When is the best age to be a woman pursuing leadership in 2026?
The comforting news for me is that educated female leaders in their 40s are trending. According to a last articleExecutives at our country’s 50 largest companies are getting younger, more likely to be women, more likely to have a business-related education, and 50 percent more likely to have been born overseas. The average age of a CEO in Australia today is 47, younger than at any other time. This age is certain to decrease as artificial intelligence encourages younger generations to act on business ideas.
Does this mean that being an older Millennial is a temporary moment when we’re still young enough to understand TikTok and the fluid fads of Zoomers, but suddenly mature enough to be invited to a board? If it existed, would it be a sweet spot where youth, ambition, and experience collide to create the perfect conditions for success?
Ask me in a few weeks.
Laura Prael is a content marketer, speaker and director of agency LEP Digital.
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Laura Prael is a content marketer, speaker and manager of the agency LEP Digital.
