Cummins spearheads Australia as England’s Ashes hopes in tatters

The DRS drama was further fueled when Jamie Smith found himself on both sides of the equation, eventually falling behind by 22 points amid much confusion.

Players from both sides have little faith in Snicko, causing Mitchell Starc to shout: “Snicko needs to be fired. This is the worst technology ever.”

It will now be a miracle for England to win the Ashes. They need to get themselves back into this game, overturn a potential deficit en route to a famous victory, then win in Melbourne and Sydney, one win on Australian soil in the last 15 years.

Like Brisbane, Stokes took his ego out of the game and hunkered down, crawling with a strike rate of 29.8; This same team used to snicker a few years ago when they were doing better than running the ball.

Stokes, struggling with cramps, made 45 off 151 balls.

“I know the strike rate is down, but it’s very difficult to row a boat with 11 people on your own,” former Australian coach Justin Langer told Channel Seven.

“He tries hard for his team. He talks about working hard, fighting hard. There is no one with him. In contrast, in Australia there are 11 men working together.”

Whether it was Cameron Green’s strike with his second ball – finding Harry Brook’s lead for 45 – or Scott Boland’s sensational spell of 2-1 from five overs in 40-degree heat, Australia’s plan to stay calm worked very well.

Meanwhile, Bazball’s reign is in shambles; Stokes’ heated exchange with Archer exemplifies a camp holding on.

“Those passionate images [Stokes and Archer] “This change encapsulates what the tour means to England,” retired great Adam Gilchrist said on Fox Cricket.

“They came in with this game plan that they had been following for a long time but with seven and a half days of cricket it literally fell apart.

“There is uncertainty and disagreement about what the plan should be.”

The British mood was best summed up by broadcaster Piers Morgan, who declared after day one of the series that Stokes was the greatest Englishman since Winston Churchill.

“It’s true, no nonsense in England,” Morgan wrote to her 8.6 million followers on X. “I want these last two wickets taken as soon as possible and I want about 400 wickets on the board. Flat pitch, hot day, no excuses.”

Six hours later, with England in turmoil, Morgan wrote: “FFS” and three red angry face emojis.

It took 165 days for Lyon to take his 563rd Test wicket – level with McGrath – but it took just three more minutes to move into second place on Australia’s all-time list behind Shane Warne (708).

Lyon acted “dirty” for missing out on Brisbane but backed up his pre-Test declaration that he had no point to prove by spinning a web and smashing Ollie Pope (three) and Ben Duckett (29) inside three balls, prompting McGrath to pretend to angrily throw a chair in the commentary box.

The chair joke was made up by former Australian fast bowler Damien Fleming, but in all fairness McGrath was brimming with pride as Lyon finished the day with 2-51 from 22 overs.

Speaking to the BBC, McGrath said: “What a bowler. Nathan Lyon deserves to get this.”