Meet you at the smart fridge

“In the old days, people often thought of the living room or dining room as the family center, but I recently saw an ad describing the refrigerator as the family center,” laments Paul Duncan of Leura. “It’s a pretty depressing scenario where the family is gathered around a refrigerator. Probably while using their phones.”

Balgowlah’s Roger Harvey has another border (C8) farce to relate: “I went through a dozen countries on a bus tour in 1981. We couldn’t get passport stamps as a group, so I drew my own design for each border crossing. Months later I was traveling alone and was taken into a room by armed guards at a Moroccan border post. They then sat me down and pointed harshly at my passport logos. One said gruffly: ‘Why’ for Morocco.” Didn’t you draw lots?’ And yes, years later, I learned a harsh lesson when returning the expired book for replacement.”

“A few years ago, as we crossed the land border between Turkmenistan and Uzbekistan, earnest border guards took our passports and examined them carefully,” recalls Grahame Burton of Hurlstone Park. “The guards were called and a very senior-looking officer came to examine our passports. They were most fond of the holographic kangaroos that moved in certain lights. They told us in bad English but better Russian that we were the first ones they had seen with such flashy passports.”

“I like seeing smart license plates on vehicles, so I was wondering if any Kona drivers have SILNCE on their license plates?” says Warwick Sherman of Huntleys Point.

“Thanks to a tolerant girlfriend, my son got to drive his high-powered sports car around an abandoned airport in the UK,” writes Jo Rainbow of Orange. “The pump driver had taught his mates how to ‘damn it’ how to take a bite (C8). I wish England cricketers had learned ‘damn it, watch this’.”

Geoff Carey, of Pagewood, said: “He was mortified to read Mary Poirrier’s account of wandering around Rookwood Cemetery with fangs. Surely this must have happened in the dead of night?”

Pauline Hanson’s burqa display in the senate this week was worrying for some members of the demographic, as was Braddon’s well-publicised dinner with brakeman Barnaby Joyce; But what really bothered Stephanie Edwards of Leichhardt was the huge Saxa salt shaker on the table. “Older Australians like these two are advised to reduce their salt intake to stay healthy.”

Column8@smh.com.au

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