Parents who are good at handling tantrums use 7 phrases with their kids
Every parent knows what is like to encounter with anger, melting and emotional explosions. They can make daily life impossible.
But years later Reading more than 200 parents’ relationships (And from applying healthy habits with my own child), I found that parents who were really good in addressing anger tits use a language that lies, confirms and guides. They try to avoid penalties or time -out and understand that anger thirst is a sign of the nervous system of distress.
Here are the seven calm but powerful expressions that the parents who are emotionally adapted to the connection of the parents, feel their children safe, and ultimately help prevent melting.
1. ‘You have a great feeling. I’m right here. ‘
In its place: “Now stop crying!”
This expression does what no result can do: it now allows a child to borrow your soils and calmness. He tells the nervous systems that they do not have to deal with their emotions alone and that you are not afraid of their emotions.
When children are supported with great emotions, they move faster than them and learn that they do not have to climb to attract your attention.
2. ‘I believe you.’
In its place: “You’re dramatic. Not that bad.”
Children are often “good” or “This is not very important!” But the parents who say, “I believe you,” give their children something much stronger: verification.
Verification of your child Strengthens the inner compass and confidence. Children who feel that they believe that they are calmed faster because they don’t have to fight to be understood. This sense of trust helps them regulate faster.
3. ‘Your emotions make sense.’
In its place: “There is no reason to worry about it.”
Even if the situation does not seem like a big thing to us, children need to know that their reactions are understandable. This expression helps them organize and process what they feel instead of pushing or moving.
When children know that their emotions are normal, they stop fighting against them and can act more naturally than them.
4. ‘I’m not sorry for you. I’m here to help you with this. ‘
In its place: “You are very annoying!”
Parents often think that they should show anger to prove a point. However, in reality, assurance disables a child’s fighting or flight reaction more effectively than punishment.
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When children do not feel threatened by your anger, they can focus on calming instead of defending themselves.
5. ‘Feeling angry is not a problem. I won’t let you harm yourself or anyone else. ‘
In its place: “What is your problem? Stop hitting or else!”
This expression is compassionate boundaries models. It sends the message that all emotions are allowed and valid, but not some actions.
Your goal during anger bays should be embarrassed to determine boundaries. Children who are not ashamed of their emotions reduce the intensity and frequency of explosions by learning to express them in a healthier way.
6. ‘Hurry. I’m not going anywhere. ‘
In its place: “Calm down now!”
Many vigils are feeding on panic (for example, panic in which love or security can be withdrawn). This simple expression reduces anxiety and creates conditions that a child should regulate.
When children do not rush from their emotions, they naturally return to calm faster than they are pressing to “overcome”.
7. ‘We will bring this together.’
In its place: “You must understand that yourself.”
Ultimately, what every child wants to know is: “Are you still with me now?” This statement reminds them that they are not alone and that their values are not dependent on perfect behavior.
Children who think that they are supported by difficult moments make future melting less by relying on their ability to cope with difficulties.
The secret to handle the anger tits? Check from control
What makes these expressions so strong is the change of mentality they represent. Instead of seeing your child’s great feelings as something that will stop, you see them as something that will witness them. Instead of trying to control your emotions, you help them feel safe enough to process them.
Of course, these statements will not stop every melting on their runway. But they plant seeds that turn into a good thing: a child who trusts their own emotions, knows that they are worthy of support and believes that love is not lost when life becomes difficult.
Reem Rauda He is the creator of a leading sound and two transformative magazines in conscious parenting – FoundationsStep -by -step healing guide, which transforms overwhelmed parents into emotionally safe ones BorderThe connection magazine, which creates lifelong confidence and strengthens the mother -in -law’s bond in just a few minutes a day. It is widely recognized as it redefines what it means to educate healthy children emotionally in terms of emotional safety of children. Follow Him Instagram.
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