Lindsey Vonn turns heads at the ESPYs, the US men’s team was disgustingly snubbed & Dechambeau fires back

‘Nightcaps’ is a daily column that catches up with the biggest sports, news and culture stories you might have missed while pretending to do work at your desk. Operates Monday to Friday OutKick.com.

Wow. We’re on the other side of the week, girls and boys. And as of today we are on the other side of the moon!

The ESPYs were last night. Do you know? I didn’t. Imagine my surprise when I woke up this morning and found out! Remember the day when the ESPN-led awards show was appointment viewing? It always marked the midpoint of summer, right?

It usually falls on the slowest sporting day of the year (in non-World Cup years, of course) and makes up for the difference nicely.

But this year he came and went with little to no fanfare, which is… fair… considering how far ESPN has fallen over the years. And man, they didn’t do themselves ANY favors last night.

On that note, welcome to Thursday Night Hats, where ESPN disparages the absurdity of our great U.S. hockey teams. This is truly mind-boggling. You will see.

What else? Lindsey Vonn turns heads on the red carpet and is getting stuck in a portable wagon the worst thing that can happen to a person in this life?

And I’m not talking about being locked inside. I’m talking about literally falling into the toilet and getting stuck under it.

I’ve never been this disgusted. Stay tuned!

Treat yourself to a drink — dealers’ choice today! – and get ready for the Thursday ‘Cap’.

Is ESPN serious about this snub?

Before we start… watch this video if you have time. I watch Jimmy V’s speech once a year at ESPY time and it’s the best.

True story: I took a public speaking class in college and we had to choose a speech to give at the end of the semester. I chose this. I’m sure I suck at it, but whatever. This is still my favorite speech of all time – and that includes Lincoln’s address!

Anyway, we went HE Here’s a moment from 1993 at the latest edition of the ESPYs last night:

Oh my god. The difference 30 years can make is truly remarkable. Do you think that in 1996, people who were alive and well in the 50s and 60s were seeing a social transformation similar to what we are experiencing? No hit, right?

While this little performance is certainly a talker, real speaker of the night. No. This happened a few hours later when the New York Knicks were inexplicably given the “top name”. Best Team.

other finalists?

• Las Vegas Aces, WNBA
• Los Angeles Dodgers, MLB
• Indiana Hoosiers, NCAA Football
• Carolina Hurricanes, NHL
• Texas Longhorns, NCAA Softball
• Seattle Seahawks, NFL
• USA Team Men’s Hockey
• Team USA Women’s Hockey

Do you want to escape?

Enjoy your meal. Let me make sure I have the right…

The U.S. men’s and women’s OLYMPIC hockey teams won gold this year; the men won for the first time since the Miracle Game, and ESPN gave the “Best Team” award to the New York Knicks instead.

Okedokee. Logical!

To top it all off, they were awarded the “Best Game” award for OG Anunoby’s tip-in in GAME 4 of the Finals, which allowed Jack Hughes to win the Olympic gold medal instead of his GOLD GOAL.

Do you know? I would argue that reporting is not actually the most important thing. second best game of the year! I’d put both the Golden Goal and Miguel Rojas’ game-tying home run in the ninth inning of GAME 7 of the World Series above that!

Yeah, I mean… come on. What are we doing here? In what world is the USA’s first game-winning, gold medal-winning goal in forty years NOT the game of the year? This is just crazy.

Oh good. ESPN needs to pander to the NBA audience. I think it’s in the rule book.

You know what’s not in the rule book? Fell from someone’s toilet porta-john and it needs to be cut:

Lindsey Vonn is back in the spotlight and Bryson’s Open strategy!

“Come on, get out of there!”

“Watch your fucking self, we’re going to go way back, we’re going to go all the way!”

“I’m not lifting, lean forward!”

“I can’t, stupid…”

“I’m stupid…k? While you’re stuck in the urinal?”

Incredible content coming out of Kansas City today. I’ve never seen anything like it. We’re living in great times right now, folks. Take it all in. As Jimmy V says, never take things for granted.

Okay, let’s jump start this Thursday lesson into a big Thursday night. First? While we were all sleeping or drinking our morning coffee, Bryson DeChambeau was playing elite golf at Royal Birkdale:

After a miserable season in which he missed every major cut, Bryson shot a 3-under 67 and moved into fifth place after Day 1. This of course came a day after Sir Nick Faldo lit it up like a Christmas tree.

“He has no idea about his strategy and I’ll tell him that to his face,” Faldo said ahead of the opening round.

Take a look:

Tell us how you really feel, Nick!

Naturally, Bryson shot a 67 and used the word “strategy” three times in his post-round interview:

Is DeChambeau BACK? I have no idea. Let’s see if he can carry this to tomorrow. I personally hope so. I’ve called Bryson a lot of bullshit this season, but the game is so much better when we’re in contention.

I didn’t think Royal Birkdale would be the place to turn it around, but I’m all for it. Give them hell, Bryson!

Lindsey Vonn attended the 2026 ESPY Awards at the David H. Koch Theater at Lincoln Center on July 15, 2026 in New York. (Angela Weiss/AFP via Getty Images)

OK, that’s it for today. Good work everyone. Here’s Jutta Leerdam and Lindsey Vonn dominating the ESPY red carpet to take us all home.

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Patriots.

Was the USA deceived? Email me Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.