Sister of murdered mum of three speaks of her legacy

The legacy of a mother of three torn apart by her husband saved lives where hers were tragically lost, her sister says.

Former Miss Brisbane Allison Baden-Clay was murdered by her then-husband Gerard Baden-Clay in April 2012, aged just 43.

Her three daughters, then ages 10, 8 and 3, are now adult women; They spent the most important years of their lives without their beloved mother.

But out of the tragedy that caused her family so much pain and cruelty grew a legacy that Ms. Baden-Clay’s sister, Vanessa Fowler, said helped save lives.

Following her sister’s death, Ms. Fowler founded the Allison Baden-Clay Foundation, an organization dedicated to raising awareness about domestic and family violence.

Speaking ahead of a memorial service in Brisbane for fatal victims of domestic and family violence, Ms Fowler said her sister’s tragic story had helped others live where she had not.

“We decided early on what we wanted his legacy to be, we wanted it to be positive,” he said.

“When Allison was murdered, domestic and domestic violence was a topic no one wanted to talk about – it was an ugly conversation.

“But now so many women have told me that they heard her story and that it was a catalyst for them to find the courage to leave abusive relationships and find help. In that sense, she saved lives.”

Ms Fowler said having such a lasting legacy was something her sister would be proud of.

“Allison was the kind of person who always wanted to put others before herself, so I think she would be honored that she always devoted her heart and soul to helping others,” Ms. Fowler said.

beautiful women

Ms Fowler also spoke of her pride in seeing her three nieces, now aged 24, 22 and 19, being able to grow up in the care of their grandparents.

As the trio grew older, they became increasingly aware of what had happened to their mother, she said.

“We see a lot of Allison in them,” he added. “Obviously it was very difficult for me and my family to know that she missed so many milestones, and I think the girls feel that too.

“Allison was deprived of the opportunity to see her daughters grow into beautiful women.

“They’ve had so much support over the years. There was a village around us helping to raise them, but Allison instilled so much resilience in them that we’re so proud of the women they’ve become.”

real acceleration

Ms Fowler talked about an awareness month dedicated to educating people about the different types of domestic and family violence and how they affect daily lives.

She said that in the years since her sister’s death, conversations about the subject have become much less taboo.

“I think there’s real momentum, particularly in Australia, and it’s come a long way in terms of people being able to talk about it, but there’s still a lot of work to be done,” Ms Fowler said.

“I still think there needs to be more conversation about coercive control, which is as destructive as physical and sexual violence.”

If it were not for her husband’s actions, Mrs. Baden-Clay would now be 57 and would soon have three daughters in their 20s.

But thanks to her family’s efforts, other women were likely spared the same terrible fate.

“Life isn’t always fair and this tragedy has thrust us into the spotlight, but we were determined to make his legacy a positive one and we know his story helps others,” Ms Fowler said.