Congratulations, David calamity Lammy – on worst PMQs performance ever | Politics | News
Oh dear, what a disaster Lammy. He is a walking, talking disaster. A mess of a human being. If David Lammy were in Mr. Men, he would be Mr. Forgetful, Mr. Wrong, Mr. Grumpy, Mr. Fib, Mr. Muddle and Mr. Bullshit all rolled into one. We’ll stick with Mr. Calamity for now.
He was given the simple task of stepping into Keir Starmer’s shoes during PMQs as the Prime Minister set off into the Amazon jungle to save the planet from global warming. Not exactly a difficult act to follow for Ser Keir’s second-in-command.
Opposing Mr Calamity’s message was shadow defense secretary James Cartlidge, the silver fox of the Tory front bench.
What was expected to be a quiet and boring Commons clash on Wednesday lunchtime was anything but.
It started going bad for Mr Calamity from the start, turning into his worst PMQ performance ever.
After opening the session with a somber Remembrance ceremony, it quickly became clear that she was not wearing a poppy. An embarrassing oversight perhaps?
The incompetent Justice Secretary made matters worse when, to save his blushes, he was given a gift from the Labor Party that belonged to a decorated RAF war hero.
He blamed his mistake on buying a new suit on Wednesday morning because his godmother would be watching.
That alone would be bad enough for Mr. Calamity.
But he wasn’t done yet.
When asked four, five, possibly six times – no one, not even the Speaker of the House, was sure – whether other asylum seekers had been mistakenly released from prison since sex attacker Hesdush Kebatu, the justice minister refused to answer.
Mr. Calamity quickly transformed into Mr. Angry; He leaned over the distribution box, waving his arms and jabbing his fingers.
The silver fox looked surprised but kept pressing again and again.
It turns out there was indeed another immigrant sex offender who was accidentally released from HMP Wandsworth a week ago.
The Conservatives knew shortly before the PMQs and so did Lammy.
There was still time for the bizarre revelation that a DNA test showed he was 5% Scottish.
If Mr. Calamity ever does PMQ again, which is very likely, he might show up wearing a skirt.
McCalamity anyone?
