‘I’ve banned most men from my massage clinic because of their behaviour’

After just three months working as a qualified massage therapist, Maria decided to be more selective about who she treated.

The 38-year-old refuses to take on new male clients because the inappropriate behavior of some of them frightens and disturbs her.

BBC Scotland News spoke to a number of female therapists who said they were constantly faced with ‘extra’ demands, sleazy banter and the boundaries they had set being pushed back.

Industry leaders say sexualized behavior is a widespread problem and more needs to be done to keep everyone safe.

Maria, who owns Gentle Hands Massage Therapy in East Ayrshire, told the BBC she left the room while clients were getting ready.

They take off their clothes but not their underwear and lie on the massage table covered with a blanket.

He said a client he has refused to see since has repeatedly asked to be identified.

“When I walked in, she was lying face down on the table with her legs open and her loose underwear on,” she says.

“We talked about it in every session, and he said, ‘I understand, but I don’t like it.'”

On another occasion, the man tried to point to his crotch before the woman turned around and reminded her that he was not trained to treat that area.

There were also constant compliments about helping him “stay alive.”

“When it’s separated, you can’t see the pattern,” he says. “Looking back now, I see how he tried to gain my trust and lower my guard.”

When another client claimed she didn’t want to cover up, she decided enough was enough and started her own women-focused business.

“It was like a cumulative experience with the guys,” he says.

“Half an hour before the massage I would always get really stressed, going over scenarios of what could happen and how I should act.

“When I treat women, it’s different. I don’t feel threatened. I’m not afraid,” he says.

She currently has two long-term male clients but is not accepting anyone new.

It’s slower to build the business, but Maria says she feels happier and really loves her job.

Dani retrained as a massage therapist six years ago after being made redundant from a job selling bins and containers.

After working in some of Scotland’s top spas, she took the plunge last year and set up her own massage and stretching business, Drift by Dani.

The 35-year-old man, who lives in Glasgow, will only treat men he knows or ‘by referral’ if other clients can vouch for it.

He says safety is his number one priority, especially when working alone late at night.

He once forbade a client from joking about offering “happy endings” to his friends.

“It only takes one person to believe this kind of thing, which also damages my reputation,” he says.

“I basically told him he wasn’t allowed to come back,” he says.

“It took a while to build customers, to build a reputation, it’s a very serious thing and you have to protect that, you have to protect your security as well.”

Dani and Maria say they would like to see more standardized training for therapists on how best to deal with inappropriate behavior and red flags to look out for.

There is no statutory governing body for the massage industry in Scotland and there are no laws regulating massage therapists.

Maria also says she would like to see a governing body so therapists can report incidents to her.

“We have nowhere to go except the police, but sometimes we question ourselves. Is it enough?” he says.

Jenny Storey has been in the industry for 25 years.

She owns a salon and training school and is a spokesperson for the British Association of Beauty Therapy and Cosmetology (BABTAC).

The 44-year-old woman said there had been “a bit of an uproar” about inappropriate messages on social media, leading to more women choosing not to treat men.

“As bad as it sounds, it almost desensitizes me now because it happens so often,” he says.

“Comments like ‘Are you giving a happy ending?’ and various inappropriate comments like that.”

“Although some people obviously say it as a joke, it minimizes what we do in this industry and can also make people feel really uncomfortable,” he says.

Jenny says the problem is not new but should not be tolerated.

At her first spa job when she was 19, she says, a client locked her in a treatment room with him.

He managed to escape through another door, but he says the incident now shapes how he trains his own staff.

“Obviously this doesn’t happen to people all the time and it’s unfair to lump all men together because we have great male clients, but it’s important to prepare them for what can happen and how to deal with it,” he says.

Urban Retreat salon owner Jenny doesn’t rule out men, but says there are a small number of people who make people feel uncomfortable.

“I don’t know why this is so common in our industry because no other industry would tolerate this,” he says.

A Scottish government spokesman said: “Everyone has the right to feel safe at work and the behavior described is completely unacceptable.

“Anyone experiencing this type of harassment is encouraged to seek support.”