JAN MOIR: My trip to Meghan Markle’s pop up shop where even the Montecito set baulk at £24 for a jar of honey!

Holy jam jar, I guess, as we cruise along Route 101 from Montecito to Summerland under the rosy sun of a California winter. Even by their own disastrous standards, it’s been a week from hell for the Duke and Duchess of Sussex.

I head off to visit Meghan’s As Ever pop-up shop, located in an upscale beachside bookstore; Here, Meghan sells festive gift boxes of jams, scented candles, herbal teas, and honey duos directly to real housewives of the American Riviera; if they’re interested in her £12.50 hot spice kits (a paddle in a packet) or a tin of damn flower sprinkles (twigs in a tin). £11. If nothing else, you have to admire the boldness of the pricing. The gold velvet ribbons are also lovely.

But before we get there, let’s consider where Harry and Meghan currently stand in their own little shop of horrors – and the sad truth is that, for some, they’re increasingly becoming more of a bargain bin than top shelf.

A recent Kardashian bash at Jeff Bezos’ mansion in Beverly Hills was a case in point. What the hell? The couple apparently made complete fools of themselves by demanding their hosts remove photos of them from the 007-themed celebration from their social media accounts.

Sussex’s implicit message was: We are more special than you. We are different, we are a cut above.

This must have gone down like a cold cup of carbs with Kimmy & co; Despite their polite voices to the contrary, this must have caused their Skims to evaporate in pure rage.

Later, in a trailer for the launch of her upcoming Netflix seasonal show, Meghan is seen single-handedly inventing Christmas, then violating her own privacy by kissing Harry, boiling some of her dal tea in a pot, frantically making table centerpieces and a wreath of broccoli florets, and then muttering, “I love the holiday season.” ‘It’s about finding time to connect with the people we love.’

This is coming from a daughter who hasn’t had time to meaningfully connect with her own father or her husband’s father and brother for seven years; not to mention all the assorted friends and stepsisters who were cut and chopped along the way.

The Duchess of Sussex’s collection of sparkling wine, jams, flower spreads and mulled wine kits is on sale

Meghan’s best portrayal of herself as a stewardess is akin to Cruella de Vil being in charge of a puppy farm; sooner or later the feathers will fly.

Then came Meghan’s interview with the American edition of Harper’s Bazaar magazine on Wednesday. Any difficult or probing questions were obviously banned, and instead readers were treated to a hilarious level of smugness as our favorite jampreneur explained why he was so great.

Do you know what? He makes mistakes, just like ordinary people. Harry loves her ‘boldly, completely’ and let’s hope he means it in an emotional way rather than a friendly way. Before entering a room, she likes to be announced with a booming voice and a trumpet blowing, “Meghan, Duchess of Sussex.” Yes, even if there was only one other person in that room and that person was—I theorize now—Harry.

And she lavishes herself with praise for inspiring her children through raspberries and candy. ‘I hope they understand the value of being brave,’ he said. ‘They saw this when the jam was a pot bubbling on the stove.’

Damn that jam. I feel like frothing on my own. You might think the way she keeps it going is the elixir of life, but maybe it’s really that important to Meghan. Jam is the guiding star of the As Ever brand, and that’s why I’m here at Godmothers, housed in a 1920s white barn in the seaside town of Summerland.

It’s conveniently close to Harry and Meghan’s home at the Riven Rock estate in Montecito, which is part of this affluent enclave. The glamorous bookstore is the dream of literary agent Jennifer Rudolph Walsh and cosmetics mogul Victoria Jackson, who are both friends of local queen of the scene, Oprah Winfrey, and are therefore now part of the Montecito family of Sussex.

While Walsh was instrumental in getting Prince Harry’s autobiography The Spare published in 2023 – he calls her his fairy godmother, hence the name of the shop – Jackson is now part of Meghan’s mahjong gang.

Gift set of fruit cream by Meghan’s As Ever, priced at $42 (£31)

With its wood-burning fireplace, furry armchairs and wide oak floors, this is no ordinary bookstore, and the people who come here are far from ordinary. Women wearing Jenni Kayne chocolate cashmere and carrying £3,000 Dior tote bags peruse the shelves, while men in James Perse suede jackets park their sparkling Benzos outside this world where everything is tasteful, beautiful, greedy and ostentatious.

To get to Meghan’s expansive pop-up, you have to walk past a stairwell photo shrine to inspirational godmothers who have ‘lit the way’, including Frida Kahlo, Michelle Obama, Gloria Steinem, Joan Didion and Oprah. Rudolph Walsh says his bookstore “has a sacred feeling.” ‘People come in and are called into their sacred self, and it permeates the entire experience.’

Located on the first floor, next to the cookbook nook and with an ocean view out front, Meghan arranged her wares on oak tables; The jams, honey, teas and two types of scented candles in the gift box are displayed under glass containers like valuable museum artifacts. “Meghan likes the mint one best because it reminds her of her wedding day,” says one of the flamboyant shop assistants.

I don’t have the courage to tell him that anything minty that day was probably Uncle Andrew’s weird mouthwash. Meghan was so appalled by the ‘musty’ smell of St George’s Chapel in Windsor that she asked to spray it with air freshener, but Buckingham Palace refused the request.

Speaking of which, I can’t help but point out that Megan went royally hard with her store paintings, trying to make everything as gorgeous as possible and following the Downton Abbey vibe that Americans love so much.

Jars full of their precious preserves are displayed on silver platters – can everyone please curtsy – there are lush bouquets of eucalyptus and leaves in silver vases, and there’s even a fake bottle of As Ever sparkling wine displayed in a silver ice bucket – actually filled with water. Since godmothers do not have an alcohol license, the real thing is not allowed.

A small sign next to a giant wine box, the centerpiece of the exhibition, reads ‘Share the Love’. The following words are engraved in bold letters on the front; ‘Carefully edited by Meghan, Duchess of Sussex.’

Border! I mean, really. Five years after Prince Harry and his ambitious wife fled Europe to escape the tyranny of inherited privilege, they continue to skate on the thin ice of sheer courage; They use their royal titles as commercial tools to increase sales, while maximizing all the benefits and gloss of the old life they publicly despise and claim to hate.

The Duchess of Sussex in the Netflix series With Love, Meghan, released in March

It’s so hypocritical, but it works. There’s a chill you can sense in the excitement of being close to royalty in the customers who gather around, sniffing the candles and wondering if £48 for two jars of honey is a good deal, even if it’s made by ‘wow, Duchess Megan’.

But my holy self noticed that people were browsing but not buying, and the girl in the store wasn’t even sure which item was the best seller. ‘Jam?’ he wondered.

Will this ragtag assortment of fruit creams, wines, candles and teas be a royal success? Or will the Duchess of Sussex go down in history as the woman who turned wine into water?

Back home, King Charles and Prince William plan to downsize the monarchy to make it more relatable in 21st century society. I think we all know where the silver ax should fall first.