Pride comes before a ball
“One of the disturbing features of the FIFA World Cup is the self-centred, even rude performance of many of the strikers, often ignoring or physically pushing their celebrating team-mates into the spotlight,” says Rosebery’s Chris Commens. “I googled to see if there was a term for this behavior. ‘Credit stealer’ is a loose answer from AI. Did goal scorers continue to do so 50 years ago?”
Kiama’s Nola Tucker also joins the roundball pileup: “Who needs acting lessons to show us how to do it when the football is there? Is there anything more convincing than a player’s clutches, grimaces and writhing as the opposition nearly hits him? ‘I’ll just lie here moaning until the referee does something.’ Academy Award stuff.”
“I was sorry to hear of the passing of Bonnie Tyler,” says Peter Cole of Narrabeen. “I once had a GPS device in my car that I named ‘Bonnie’ after her. It kept telling me to turn around and every now and then it would break down.”
“As an opal buyer visiting Lightning Ridge in 1978, I was suggested to join the Australian Order of Old Bastards (C8) by local opal cutter Greg Pardy,” recalls Warwick Sherman of Huntleys Point. “Greg said I had to put the word aardvark in a sentence to qualify for membership. So, almost without thinking, I said, ‘I’d drive a million miles to eat anteater for your one smile, mommy.’ I was accepted right away.”
“George Zivkovic of Northmead’s ‘Old Fart Beer’ (C8) is for others who might find it annoying after a few brews. I came across a glimpse of ‘My Wife’s Bitter’ in a local specialty bottle-o a few years ago, which has a lot of unknown beer varieties,” says Waitara’s Richard Jary. “It was a pretty good fall as I recall.”
George now has other problems: “I think we’ve all seen a car insurance company’s ‘practice makes perfect’ commercials on TV, but who collects the balls left behind after the cars have been restarted and driven away?”
“A memorable scavenger hunt (C8) at the University of NSW in the 70s involved 1000 points for a police car with a cop (the local cop shop happily accepted as it was good PR) and nearly a million points for a burger with a signed receipt from Harry’s Café de Wheels,” reports Dave Horsfall of North Gosford. “Hint: they don’t sell burgers.”
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