As cemeteries fill, Australians choose forests

When Helen Rafferty succumbed to a five-year illness on the eve of the first Covid-19 lockdown, her husband Michael had to act quickly to say goodbye to his “beloved wife of 44 years”.

Three days after his death, borders were closed, cities were evacuated and families across Australia were separated from their loved ones.

The Raffertys’ children, scattered between the United States and Australia, did not have time to return home before restrictions took effect and the pandemic closed borders.

“They all missed death,” Mr Rafferty told AAP.

Before the state effectively shut down, Helen had to act quickly to go ahead with the tribute, which she wrote and sang for.

It was held just in time for Mr. Rafferty, but his children didn’t get the chance to say a proper goodbye to their mother.

“The city was shut down that same day – the 18th – and I came home from the memorial, walked into an empty house, and stayed there for two years,” Mr. Rafferty recalls.

“Isn’t there even someone we can have a cup of coffee with?”

Mrs. Rafferty’s body was cremated and her ashes were divided into three containers for the couple’s children.

At first, Michael held on to them, believing that eventually they would return and together decide what would happen.

“I kept them there, hoping the kids would come back,” he says.

But as months and years passed, Michael realized he had to make a decision.

“I talked to one of my sisters and she said, ‘Make your choice, it’s your decision. It’s no one else’s,'” he says.

In the backyard stood a Wollemi pine, one of the oldest and rarest tree species in the world.

The couple was growing the tree from a cutting taken from a specimen rediscovered in the Blue Mountains decades ago.

The tree, which by then had reached a height of two meters, was Helen’s pride and joy.

“Helen gardened like there was no tomorrow,” Mr. Rafferty says.

“The pine was Helen’s pine. She chose it. I nurtured it.”

Then, while reading the newspaper one morning, he came across an advertisement for Mornington Green, a memorial park on Victoria’s Mornington Peninsula offering environmentally focused commemoration options.

“I said, ‘What I want to do is put Helen’s ashes (under the pine)’,” he recalls.

The decision was made immediately.

“I didn’t even think twice,” he says.

She was one of the first bereaved people to choose this option, and Helen’s Wollemi pine was the first tree planted in the park overlooking West Port Bay.

“The whole environment is just amazing,” Mr. Rafferty says.

“Perfect place for Helen.”

He now visits the site on Helen’s birthday, wedding anniversaries and other important dates.

“Normally I say a little prayer and walk around and just take a look and wander out,” he says.

“And I am at peace.”

Australians are increasingly re-evaluating what happens after death.

Traditional burial practices continue to consume urban land, especially in large cities where cemetery space is increasingly limited.

Current space on Crown land is likely to run out within 30 years, while in Sydney this is likely to be the case in less than a decade, with at least 70,000 spaces soon needed just to keep pace.

At the same time, cremation, now preferred by more than 70 per cent of Australians according to industry estimates, carries an environmental footprint through energy use and emissions.

A growing number of monument providers are promoting alternatives that focus instead on preservation, restoration and natural memorialization.

Living Heritage ForestThe initiative, a first in Australia, allows ashes to be placed in protected forest areas such as Mornington Green to regenerate habitat and restore biodiversity.

“Now that people are aware of the toxic profile of ashes, which have the same pH as bleach and a cup of salt, people can process the ashes to help a tree grow instead of harming it,” explains Warren Roberts, one of the founders of Living Legacy Memorial Gardens. he explains.

“Living Heritage is a paradigm shift in how we leave the earth.

“Instead of cutting down trees to make room for coffins and graves, people are becoming trees and creating sheltered forests.”

The organization estimates that if even 10 per cent of Australians chose forest monuments, more than 5400 hectares of conservation forest could ultimately be created.

Other commemoration alternatives include incorporating cremated remains into artificial reef structures and biodegradable containers, or even turning ashes into diamonds.

But the decision had little to do with trends, according to Mr. Rafferty. It was about Helen.

“He loved the pine,” he says.

“He would be very happy. He would be absolutely delighted.”

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