The hidden casualties of secret wars

Former US Army Ranger Sean Griobhtha ‘X Rubicon’ It is a powerful and deeply disturbing account of war, trauma, and the human cost of covert military operations, writes Jim Kable.

JUST DAYS AGO I sat in a cinema here in southeastern Australia and watched another slick recruitment ad: young men and women running on the beach, throwing themselves into the afternoon surf.

Career. Adventure. Friendship.

What the ad doesn’t show is the aftermath: moral injuries, post-traumatic stress disorder, suicides, and a Veterans Affairs apparatus seemingly aimed at circumventing the duty of care. It is against this background Sean Griobhtha‘s x Rubicon It demands to be read.

Griobhtha (pronounced gree-O-tah), a former U.S. Army Ranger, tells the corroborated account of a young man he trained—identified only by his CIA-assigned codename Rubicon—who joined the U.S. Air Force at age 18 in 1979, during a time of desperate unemployment, and was channeled into a secret Boy Scout program to conduct CIA proxy combat operations in Central and South America.

Over the course of two and a half years, Rubicon completed 18 combat missions that included 14 operations from El Salvador and Guatemala to Nicaragua, Colombia and Mexico; These missions were so deeply secret that the agencies that ordered them would deny their existence until 2085.

This is not speculation. Reproduced in full in the book is the four-page (redacted) letter from the Office of the Director of National Intelligence, obtained by Rubicon in May 2021 after years of blocked requests. This letter confirms his operational record: Air Force Cross, two Silver Stars, four Bronze Stars, Defense Distinguished Service Medal, and CIA Distinguished Service Medal; Each of these was taken away from him when he refused to continue killing.

Rubicon’s DD-214 discharge certificate had been so severely compromised that it was rendered useless. The reason for leaving was listed with characteristic military disdain as follows: ‘APATHY – DEFECTIVE ATTITUDE’. He was only in his early 20s.

The ODNI letter also granted conditional permission to publish his account, with the stipulation that: ‘It seems fictional’. Griobhtha and Rubicon reversed this absurd demand. As the Author Disclosure states: This work is pure fiction in the sense of the lies, corruption, and false agendas that make it all possible. The reality of what was done to a young man and what was done in the name of his country is not fiction.

The separation was followed by almost forty years of silence and pain; severe post-traumatic stress disorder, three suicide attempts, the unbearable weight of carrying the ghosts of more than 300 people killed by their own hands. His only lifeline was his wife, Julie, with her remarkable preface. ‘Or the Pioneer’ — describes loving a man who hid knives and drugs for years, showed extreme caution, and couldn’t tell her what was bothering him until he finally broke the silence.

The book makes a striking case that the adolescent brain (their frontal lobes are still years away from maturation) is neurologically incapable of the moral judgment required of these tasks. Rubicon was 18 years old. The army knew.

Griobhtha, who lost contact with Rubicon in 1982 but tracked him down in 2015, spent years independently verifying the account; He interviewed pilots, flight engineers, Rangers, SEALs, CIA analysts, State Department personnel, and civilians in many countries. The result is a work of forensic rigor wrapped in raw, cinematic prose.

In a striking development, the 2026 edition includes a letter from a retired Air Force Special Operations Command (AFSOC) The Commander is a general officer who uses his security clearance to access CIA records and photographs of Rubicon’s missions. What he found shocked him.

The Commander, who wrote on the last page of his official letterhead, was subjected to an incident, in his own words. Smedley Uşak– made something of a conversion and made an offer that amounted to an apology on behalf of the United States: unofficial, but in writing, he said, with firm conviction and sincerity. This is an extraordinary document; in which a senior officer confirmed the existence of duty logs and photographs in the CIA’s possession, and acknowledged what was done to the young men in the name of national security.

The book also includes currently ‘Before You Sign: A Letter to Young People’Released under Creative Commons and republished by National Network Against the Militarization of Youth (anonymous) And Veterans for Peace. It is an invaluable resource for any parent, educator, or youth considering joining the military.

I was reminded Mary O’Hare‘s angry challenge Kurt Vonnegut: “You were just babies then!” – his insistence not to glamorize what was done to children sent to war. X Rubicon honors this charge. It’s not fascinating. He doesn’t move.

This is amazing cri de coeur – and blaming an entire nation for the sacrifice of its young people. It’s gritty, cinematic, forensically documented and, most of all, honest. I strongly recommend this book. It requires reading and re-reading and is not worth the effort.

You can get X Rubicon from: Bookstore and other bookstores around Australia.

James S Kable is the founder of the Yoshida Shōin International Pedagogical Fellowship and a retired History and English teacher in New South Wales, Spain, Germany and Japan.

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