Pupil who says she was groomed by paedophile head in fight for compensation
A former pupil says he is suffering from nightmares and flashbacks after claiming he was groomed by former headmaster Neil Foden.
Meg (not her real name) said the convicted pedophile groomed her in 2023, when she was 14 and a student at Ysgol Friars in Bangor, Gwynedd.
She said he did not physically or sexually assault her, but the impact of his behavior continues to affect her.
Cyngor said Gwynedd must now prove the impact his alleged care had on him after insurers acting on Gwynedd’s behalf invited him to withdraw his claim to help cover the cost of therapy.
The council said all compensation claims relating to Foden were under consideration.
Letter from Cyngor Gwynedd’s insurers, newiddion S4CShe stated that there was no allegation that Foden touched her and that she had “no legal liability” for the allegation she suggested.
Foden Sentenced to 17 years in prison in 2024 for a series of sexual offenses against young girls.
Meg, now 17, believes she is the “new girl” named in the independent Children’s Practice Review, which examined safeguarding failures linked to Neil Foden’s offending. Released November 2025.
He said he was taken into care during a series of informal one-on-one “therapy sessions” held in Foden’s office.
Timeline of Foden’s crime
In 2023, Meg was struggling at school, and after discussing her difficulties with her parents, Foden offered to provide one-on-one support.
Meg said she was shocked when she learned of the deal.
He said: “I felt like I was in a position where I couldn’t say no.”
Meg said Foden told her not to tell her family about the meetings and also asked her family not to discuss the agreement with her.
She believes this prevents them from talking openly about what is going on as a family.
She attended 17 “support” sessions with Foden on her own and said she began opening up to him because she felt she could “trust him”.
“I remember he asked me if I was afraid of him and I answered ‘yes’. I think that confirmed that he had authority and power over me,” she said.
She said at the time that she felt “special” and “wanted someone to be there all the time.”
“I think he saw that and took advantage of it,” he said.
“After a while, I noticed that he was looking at me from head to toe.
“The care isn’t just touching, it’s controlling your mind. He was controlling my mind. He was playing a game.”
Concerns not reported
Meg’s sessions with Foden continued during a period when concerns about her behavior were discussed by senior school staff, according to the Child Practice Review.
In the report published in November 2025, 50 missed opportunities To stop the head teacher with Meg’s experience among the cases examined in the review.
Many of the failings identified by reviewers in relation to Cyngor Gwynedd and other institutions have also raised concerns about the actions of Ysgol Friars’ leadership team.
It is stated that between March and July 2023, members of the school’s senior management team, including the designated safeguarding leader, exchanged messages expressing concerns about Foden’s behaviour.
One message noted that he “spent half his time at school holding hands with little girls” before describing his habit of taking students home as “dangerous” and “questionable at best”.
In another correspondence to Foden’s office, a member of the management team wrote: “There’s another one there now.”
Days later, another message mentioned a “new girl.”
Meg believes both comments refer to her.
Although BBC Wales was unable to confirm this with the investigation team, Meg’s family provided text messages from the period in which Foden discussed one-on-one “therapy sessions” with Meg and placed her in his office while senior staff raised their concerns.
Despite teachers’ concerns at the time, no referral was made to Gwynedd Children’s Services.
The review concluded this was “a missed opportunity and evidence of a failure of the professional duty to communicate safeguarding concerns”.
Meg said Ysgol Friars staff regularly saw her visiting Foden.
Following the Children’s Practice Review report, Cyngor Gwynedd pledged to strengthen safeguarding procedures and support those affected by Foden’s offending.
The plan included commitments to “sincerely apologize to the victims and their families for their suffering” and to “support the victims, the school and the wider community to recover from the impact of these events.”
‘I blamed myself’
Meg said she was shocked when Foden was arrested. But as details emerged during the case, he began to believe he might be next.
He said it took months to “put it all together” and that he realized he was being groomed by Foden.
Looking back, he said he felt ashamed.
“I blamed myself over and over again. Why didn’t I realize what was happening?”
After Foden was jailed, Meg sought legal advice and formally notified Cyngor Gwynedd of her intention to seek compensation to help cover the cost of therapy and mental health support.
A letter from lawyers acting on behalf of Cyngor Gwynedd’s insurers claims “no legal liability” lies with the council.
He said his allegations did not meet the legal threshold for allegations that could include assault, harassment or “intentional harm”.
Meg said she was devastated by the response.
“It was heartbreaking,” he said, and questioned why the impact on his mental health should be assessed differently because there was no physical contact.
Meg said she continues to live with depression, post-traumatic stress disorder and anxiety.
He said he had a “bright future ahead of me” but still lives with the trauma almost three years later.
“I rely on medication to help me cope and try to get back the life that was taken from me,” she said.
Meg said Cyngor Gwynedd “turned her back” on her.
“The people and organizations that are supposed to protect me want me to prove the damage done.”
Cyngor Gwynedd said it accepted the shortcomings identified in the Children’s Practice Review and apologized to all victims.
The statement said Foden “is at the forefront of his victims’ and survivors’ thoughts” and that support, including independent counseling services, remains available.
While unable to comment on individual cases, the council said external insurers were responsible for investigating claims, adding that “where appropriate, we seek to resolve claims as quickly as possible to avoid the need for victims to take unnecessary legal action.”
‘Grooming is difficult to recognize’
Meg believes her case raises wider questions about the impact of grooming and its long-term effects on victims.
Child psychologist Dr. from Bangor University. Nia Williams said grooming often involves a gradual process of manipulation designed to gain the victim’s trust.
He said: “They gradually make that person feel important. They tell them, ‘I’m the only one who cares about you’ or ‘I’m the only one who listens to you.'”
Williams warned that the effects can last long after care ends, especially if victims do not receive appropriate support.
Meg hopes her story will help others recognize signs of care and speak out.
“People need to be taught what care is. Especially in a school where there are people who don’t know what the signs are.”
“I didn’t do anything to deserve this when I was 14,” he said. “This happened to me, but it doesn’t define me.”
If you are affected by the issues raised in this story, you can find information and support at: BBC Action Line.
