AMANDA PLATELL: I’m haunted by Melania’s Epstein speech. As a former spin doctor, this is why what we’re being told just doesn’t add up

Like millions of others, I watched with open mouth as Melania Trump suddenly delivered the icy, angry bombshell message: ‘I had no relationship with Jeffrey Epstein.’

‘What was this all about?’ I wondered. And more importantly, why didn’t Donald Trump tell her husband what he had done after announcing that he was ‘blind’ and didn’t know anything about it?

It was a funny marriage, I thought; A spouse cannot even manage to tell his spouse that he is planning something so important, let alone share with him the text he will read to the world.

Maybe there is a completely innocent explanation. Who knows what’s going on between the President and the First Lady?

The only thing that was certain was that Melania’s surprise statement denying any involvement with Epstein raised far more questions than answers. Questions we didn’t even think to ask before opening his mouth.

Why did he make this statement? So why now? Was he blocking something that was about to become public?

Do she and Donald Trump now live such separate lives that they exclude her from such a serious and explosive intervention? Is their marriage problematic?

Donald Trump with Melania and Epstein and Maxwell on the right

Was Melania’s dramatic lone pose symbolic of her relationship with the President? Was he trying to tell us something?

Or is she a devoted, headline-grabbing wife trying to save her husband’s life, whose popularity in the United States has waned due to the war with Iran, and whose behavior becomes more erratic and surprising by the day?

How could he keep this a secret from her anyway, as he claimed?

His speech was delivered in the heart of the White House, arguably the most security-conscious place on earth, where every phone call and footsteps will likely be monitored, for God’s sake.

A mouse can’t get in there without the place’s epic tough guys spotting it and squishing it.

As a former spin doctor familiar with organizing political broadcast events, albeit on a less grand scale, I know that planning takes weeks, if not months – lighting checks, sound checks, rehearsals.

But sources claim that no one outside of a few advisers in his inner circle even knew he was giving his speech at the White House.

As I said, none of these questions would be asked right now if it weren’t for Melania’s decision to go public about Epstein.

Apart from a few predictable weirdos on social media, no one had ever questioned the First Lady’s integrity in her dealings with him. But now she has set fire to her relationship with her husband and shed light on any relationship she may or may not have had with one of the world’s most disgusting pedophiles.

The image of him standing alone at the podium making his speech, then defiantly walking away alone into the distance haunts me. What was Melania trying to tell us? Only time will tell.

Although his speech was free given the firestorm, perhaps he should have checked this with Donald first.

fashion for fights

Having worked for a fashion magazine in Sydney during my teenage years, I was never in any doubt about the way The Devil Wears Prada depicted the awfulness of frivolous, fashion-obsessed bad girls.

Unfortunately, in the movie I was more like Anne Hathaway’s Andy Sachs; weak and outdated. I couldn’t quite recover after my editor berated my fashion sense, told me I was letting the team down, and added sternly: ‘You could almost be beautiful if you weren’t so fat.’ I was only size 12!

The chances of knowing Jack are slim.

Jack Black at age 23 at the draft, left, and age 54 in 2024, right

It’s incredible that this recently surfaced photo is an audition photo, considering 23-year-old actor Jack Black is now the Jack we know and love — especially since he was much shorter and chubbier than his co-star and love interest Kate Winslet in 2006’s The Holiday. It’s much bigger today than it was then, but there’s still something seductive about it. If Kate gets into 10th place, I doubt she’ll ever be able to work again.

Ten years after his mother Victoria trademarked the name, Brooklyn Beckham is considering taking back ownership of his name, just as he took all of his children’s names to protect them in the future. That’s nice, but considering how disdainful he is for his family, perhaps this nepo babe should drop the Beckham surname and become just plain hot sauce and sandwich maker Brooklyn Peltz?

Princess Anne had a phone conversation with her disgraced brother Andrew while Prince Edward visited her at Sandringham. But there is no sign of his daughters Beatrice and Eugenie or his ex-wife Fergie. Now they seem to have disappeared, his life and finances collapsed.

There’s a pretty sweet ad on TV featuring golfer Rory McIlroy hitting his swing and telling young people, including his daughter, to ‘never give up on your dreams’ and work hard to achieve them. The sad reality of today is that most young people only dream of becoming millionaire influencers or becoming instantly famous.

My Moggie Ted is skeptical of the story of how Ukrainian soldiers rescued a cat and dog by putting them in a bag attached to a drone that flew them to safety. As Ted slyly points out, any dog ​​in his pack would be dead before it reached the ground.

T, this is a very small tattoo

While public declarations of love continue, Euphoria actress Zendaya’s tiny ‘t’ tattoo on her armpit, which pays homage to her fiancé and Spider-Man star Tom Holland, seems a little understated. It’s so tiny it could be mistaken for a house spider.

Maybe it was out of respect because Tom was so young.

I’d be happier if the lovable former footballer and children’s icon Peter Crouch (currently worth £30million when factoring in model wife Abbey Clancy’s earnings) was also the brand ambassador for Irish bookmaker Paddy Power (pay not disclosed).

Why would a father of four with such a fortune appear on television to attract football-loving youngsters into the world of gambling? Especially when it is one of the most devastating addictions among teenage boys.

moon watch

I pray for the safe return of the Artemis II astronauts, but I can’t be the only one who didn’t stay up to watch them reach the far side of the Moon—as epic as it was. Because I’m so annoyed by that screen pig, Christina Koch. He was always holding the microphone, his long hair flowing and hiding the only person women really wanted to see, hot astronaut Victor Glover, the first black man to orbit the Moon, who modestly said: ‘I’m not writing black history, this is human history.’

And for selenophiles (Moon lovers), yes, I know the reason hair flies upward in space has to do with the lack of gravity. But hasn’t that interesting Koch woman ever heard of hair clips?

Jennifer Aniston plans wedding to hypnotist boyfriend Jim Curtis (filmed in 2024)

Should we be worried about Jennifer Aniston?

She’s planning a wedding with her hypnotist boyfriend, Jim Curtis, and they’re looking for a house while bouncing between her $15 million and $12 million mansions and her $1.2 million apartment. He also says that Jim is a devotee of ‘regression therapy’, which he says proves that they met in a past life and that ‘their souls were destined to find each other again to complete their journey in this life’.

Jen, may I suggest that your first “trip” is to see a Los Angeles attorney who specializes in premarital issues?

Tell Strait… Starmer is a joke

Starmer’s appointment of himself as head of a group of European leaders working to open the Strait of Hormuz is beyond parody, with two-thirds of voters wanting him to resign and call an election, according to the latest poll.

It would struggle to keep a tributary of the Thames open due to its history of failing to deliver on its promises.

What indescribable honor the parents of 19-year-old Orla Wates have shown since their daughter was thrown from a motorcycle to her death during her gap year in Vietnam. They flew to Hanoi to say goodbye, then agreed to donate Orla’s organs as a way of thanking Vietnam for their daughter’s happy memories there, and to take solace in the knowledge that Orla ‘lived on’ in others. As it will be in all our hearts.